Update: My Beautiful Brain
October 19, 2020 I had a follow-up baseline Brain MRI with contrast.
That date was the 31st year Anniversary of my very first MRI experience
which found the first big ol’ tumor.
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October 28, we had an appointment with my new Neurosurgeon, who I will never need in that capacity Because…. Wait for it….
As he entered the room he stated, “There’s nothing in there.”
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My reaction, “What! What do you mean there’s nothing in there? There’s a beautiful brain in there!”
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Through his laughter he said,
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“Let me rephrase that. The brain tumors are GONE.”
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“What!?! Show me!!!!” He did and they are! His report stated,
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“….there is certainly no new finding in her brain, and no other treatment is needed.”
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This is miracle stuff! They are GONE! Following 17 years after my craniotomy, they were found during an MRI.
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Now after 15 years since the second diagnosis in late 2006 and Gamma Knife Surgery in 2007, they are GONE!
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Yes, the one was gone before seven years after my craniotomy and that too was miracle stuff.
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Then 17 years later again rocking my world two appear.
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Now, today, I could sit in that fearful anxiety saying things like,
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“It’s only two years away from before.”
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Or, perpetually I could marinade in the possibility of what, right now, does not exist but what if it does in the future.
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Instead, I choose to live in the bliss of miracle stuff. Not until…..as there may never be an until.
36 Years
I push the button to play Regina’s Brain Music
And still it fills my grateful heart
And pulses my soul.
I am here….
I am blessed with life
My life with my Beloved Kenny and our sweet Baby Pups Neo and Uli Mae.
I can still feel it….
The breath of being alive….
The post pain knowing it is mine….
Mine to say Yes, I’m here. Yes, I feel it.
Yes I feel it!
The love beyond language yet tangible in soul touch.
Inhale / Exhale
I am held even when alone.
The bliss of Divinity
Of Angels wings
Of Faeries giggles
And the sadness that anyone needs to / must go through
An experience such as this ever.
Was it to get my attention?
If so, to what, who, when, and why?
36 = 9 = Complete
I am
Complete
As we all are
Born Complete
And because we forget
We must work our way back.
Thank You, Lord Father-Mother God
For saying Yes thus far 36 years.
I pray what my life has been
Thus far
As simple as it is
Has touched my purpose
While there is much more to go.
Thank You Jesus and Elizabeth
For being with me at the height of fear
And all these years later still.
I think of my Beamer
Always a Beam of Light
And will I truly meet her again
In my 80’s as my doctor
As she told me I would?
Today is quiet
No Celebration
Kenny must complete his painting task
Lining up for tomorrow’s crew
And yet
How great a task it is
Creating for us our new home.
How grand to be able to
Puppy walk in the beauty
Of this warm, colorful fall day
When all is well.
Life is good
Really good
And I am on this earth
Grateful
Breathing
Walking
Knowing
Thinking
All the ing’s
I possibly can
With a grand brain
Allowing grand thoughts
In and of Bliss.